20100221

Sunday, February 21, 2010

I do my best thinking when I am going to sleep. So many profound thoughts have been forgotten because I didn’t write them down before falling asleep, or just upon waking, for that matter. If only I could hook up something to my brain that would record my thoughts while I was I am in that state, I would have a much more detailed and complete account of my thoughts. Maybe eventually that technology will be available. Maybe I should be the one to pursue inventing it.

§

I was thinking about my conversation with Billy Rodriguez (a family friend) today, about Hume’s ethics. He mentioned a statement made by Hume about the impotence of reason in dealing with moral judgments, presumably in defense of religion, in response to a previous post I had made quoting Hume about sense experience being more reliable than the testimony of religious scriptures.

I made a pretty extensive explanation of Hume’s ethics to him, but that may have not been the best response. I don’t like to feel as if I’m intellectually bowling people over, or putting a heavy burden on them to sift through my writing to find the meaning, but I feel like that’s what I do too often. I would like to be more concise, but there just seems to be too much to say.

Anyway, the background information on Hume’s ethics may have been helpful, or even necessary to understanding the context of his statement about reason not relating to moral judgments, but I did have a new thought about it, which I didn’t state in the original reply.

If reason were truly impotent in determining ‘right’ from ‘wrong’, then we’d have no cause to assent to religious propositions about moral truth. We could accept some moral judgments and reject others, but not because they come from God or some religious authority. To reach this conclusion, we have to reason that God, or at least that religious scripture, is the source of moral truth, and use reason to defend that claim. Dismissing reason as playing some part in moral judgments would surely make the ability to determine moral truth or falsity impossible, as it cuts off any hope for justification as to why a statement is true or false.

20100109

Saturday, January 09, 2010

I read history as it is written, from right to left. But, that is not to say that it is logically impossible for this to alter. It’s imaginable that an oppressive group could seize power over the whole of humanity, for a virtually eternal amount of time, arresting or reversing the liberalization of humanity. And, as power concentrates, and those with it tend to accumulate more and relinquish none, it is documented in history that liberalizing forces, from time to time, arrest, break down and reverse this accumulation when it becomes unfit. The overall trend of forward motion, however, is one that moves from chaos to order, and oppression to freedom simultaneously, despite the fact that these dichotomies are not always aligned. So, this cycle moves humanity, throughout the history of western civilization, as aforementioned, from right to left, with the whole of humanity being afforded greater and more equal freedom, due in large part to the progress of humanist morality, or rather, human morality. And, it also moves from chaos to order, simplicity to elegance, due in large part to the power exercised by individuals or organizations.

§

James Cameron’s, Avatar, was not simply a social commentary on the U.S. use of military force to secure energy resources without regard to established culture or human life, but clearly on planetary ecology as well. I have long sympathized with this message of a need for human integration into nature, and efficient symbiosis, rather than domination and exploitation. This was absolutely clear to me even as a teenager. And, I sense that the zeitgeist is shifting from one of individualism, selfishness, and domination—which perhaps saw its peak in the late 90’s—to one of integration, cooperation, and compassion. However this global organism moves, if it moves by the influence human nature, it will move in the direction that favors the most humans the most, for the longest amount of time. In our sociological development, we’ve become better planners, able to consider long term plans and consequences, further into the future, as our supplementation of memory and thought increases with technology. This, combined with the unifying forces of communication and social networking technology, has allowed us to awaken to those practices which have been contrary to our efficiency, as well as to our humanity. And, despite the decreasing numbers of people who deny or resist this progress, it will continue as long as there are humanists among us.

§

The displacement of human labor, of jobs, by technology is not a new phenomenon, the quintessential example being the Luddites and the mechanized loom. Today we hear often about the rapid, perhaps even exponential improvement and development of technology, which translates in some areas, to the rapid, perhaps exponential replacement of human jobs by machines. All the while, the population of the world continues to increase, as our medical knowledge and ability, as well as our ability in agriculture improves due to technology also. The fact that we presently have the ability to meet the kilocalorie per day requirements for all humans alive is another issue. But, more and more people continue to become unemployed due to job replacing technologies, and this trend shows no sign of reversing. Where are these jobs going? Either they go to unskilled labor, the service sector, or the unemployment line, diminishing the middle class. This leads many people to denounce technology, as did the Luddites. But, technology is not the enemy of our collective happiness or our progress; it rather lends itself to these. Unless something alters, this trend will lead to a critical mass of sorts, where the numerous unemployed people of diminishing social and economic class will be forced to take action, or die. Could this possibly lead to something like Marx’s proletariat revolution?

§

Maybe there are some things over which we should exercise our influence, and others that we should let run their course, free from manipulation.

Tuesday, March 31, 2009

After some depression in activity, thought, and sense of purpose, I’m ready to charge again. I’ve been carrying along in my endeavors sluggishly, and have been pretty well downtrodden lately; I’m tired of the feeling. So I’ve re-imagined my purpose and my motivation and I’ve resolved to be proactive despite the deep emotional costs associated with the isolation, indifference, rejection, combativeness, disapproval, resistance, and otherwise burdening hindrances and dissociation of relatedness with others. I know that in allowing myself to be defeated, I am allowing the vision, principles, purpose, and possibilities for which I work to create and progress, and to establish and maintain, to be defeated in some way as well, by that same indifference and rejection, and, “it’s not worth it” mentality. Instead, I promote that mentality. And that is something with which I have never intended to sympathize.

I’ve made quite a bit of progress in school, but now that my tuition assistance is used up, I think I will concentrate on strengthening family and personal relationships for a while. I’ll still be reading and studying, and taking some CLEP and DANTES exams for college credit. I just finished a philosophy class, which I thoroughly enjoyed, despite the demands and deadlines which were difficult to meet due to obligations at work, and my own recent depression. I have one more class about physical training.

I’ve been really starting to rethink going into sports medicine. While it could prove to be lucrative (or could prove to not be), I don’t believe that I would be best fulfilled in my capacities by treating injuries and helping people to recover from them, even if some of my work would be in research or in exercise and training instruction. I have become very interested in the fields of evolutionary and molecular biology and genetics, as well as neurology and psychology. I wonder how many strings I might be able to tie together there, but seeing as how medicine (and all science, really) is highly specialized, I know I have a lot of work ahead of me if I want to attempt to connect those dots. Philosophy is to be a pervasive part of my life as well. I see it as an extension of science, in a way. Philosophy acts as the antennae of science, always feeling for new possible paths, determining hypotheses and pointing the direction. Science then determines the validity then by going in that direction, and practically testing it. They rely on and give feedback to each-other in that sense, like the relationship of intuition and reason. They are highly complementary, and perhaps absurd without one another, even though many people consider them to be conflicting or wholly and independently distinct.

In my philosophy class, my professor expressed some sentiment about me being a teacher’s assistant. Even though this online school does not allow this, I was excited at the idea of being able to work with and gain extra knowledge from a knowledgeable philosopher. I told him that I’d like to help do research projects or papers, or assist in whatever way possible, unofficially, but I haven’t received a response yet. I will check on that tomorrow as well.

The next thing I want to accomplish with my family is a collective mission statement. I know I have been difficult for them to deal with lately, and I will need to talk to them all about this before we can move forward with anything. I think that we have made a lot of progress lately, especially Liz with her increasing awareness and handling of her financial responsibility. But, I want to be involved in more activities with the Kids. I’ve scheduled some times for us to go out, both on family events and with just me and one of them at a time. Without school being so demanding of my time, I will be better able to do all that.

Another thing that helps me is to write, and doing it more often helps keep me focused and grounded in my purpose. I’ve been neglecting to write in my blogs or journals, or anything otherwise introspective other than papers for school. I started listen to another book, The New Psycho-Cybernetics by Maxwell Maltz M.D. It has sparked my interest in personal development and psychology again.

I get angry when I look back and see how I’ve allowed my analysis of other people and their treatment of me, and my emotions surrounding that, to depress my drive and sense of myself—to affect my self-image. I don’t know if there is a more appropriate, or more effective response that to channel that energy into productivity. I want to think of myself as I did before this great decline in self-confidence and determination, but still take some morsel of maturity out of it. Before, I was unstoppable—and then I stopped being that. So I have to stop letting things stop me again, but first, I have to know myself to be every bit, if not more, powerful and unstoppable as I was before I gave up. I have told myself that these leaders here, the people in authority positions above me, are unreliable, lacking integrity, and destructive. Even if it is so, and in most cases I very much believe it is, I cannot allow it to destroy me, even if that is its one and only purpose. I have to know, like I have always known, that I am stronger, more intelligent, more capable, more motivated, more right, and most importantly, more determined than they can ever be, in their defeated states of angst, and in their parasitic behaviors, and anxious quests for recognition and value. If they would take my value from me, and I would show them that their way is the wrong way, there is no way for me to do it by refusing to produce. Then I become worthless to them and to myself. This is no solution. If I could destroy their blood sucking minds, relinquish them of their power, reveal and alter or amputate their behavior, or otherwise eliminate their threat and the burden they place on me, I would. But until I can gain position to do that, I can only press on while they benefit from me.

Should it really be a part of my mission to destroy or defeat them?

Or should I only want to create what I can, and contribute as much as I can, rather than wasting my time with lesser humans?

Or… should I undertake it to help them?

20090112

Monday, January 12, 2009

The thing I hate the most about the navy is a supervisor’s ability to diminish someone without the risk of retribution. In most situations, people will not diminish others so openly for fear of attack or other retaliation. My ideas are good, and I seek to improve myself, my work environment, which subsequently can cause others to benefit. Too often though, I’m reproached for my proactive and independent character. Senior Chief Craig Apodaca is the main negative influence in my life, and in the division. His leadership style is detrimental to peoples’ mental health.

Today the LAN was taken down at work and I knew that we had to move our computers over to the barge to be able to use them later, as the network was being moved to the barge. But, when Craig found out that I had moved a computer, he asked me why I was doing it without his permission. I told him because I knew it had to be done, and he disagreed saying we can lock them up. I told him that we had to move them if we wanted to use them and asked where I put the computer. I told him I put it in the OPS office, and he said that that office was for the OPS officer. I said, “ok, where do you want me to move it?” And he yelled, “WELL THANKS FOR ASKING, BOATS!” and continued to affront me for the action, rather than answer my question. After he was done, I told him that the area that we used the last time we had a barge of that type was taken by the engineers. He then pointed out an area, and I said, “OK, I’ll put them there.” He then told some other people that he wanted to computers there, but, beforehand, didn’t want the computers moved at all. He effectively adopted my idea while diminishing the fact that I took the individual initiative to turn that idea into reality. I have a long list of occurrences like this documented from our previous deployment, along with dates and details.

I am tired of dealing with serpentine behavior of that nature; he is a repeat offender, in the most literal sense of the word “offender”. He offends, demeans, suppresses, and projects negativity onto anyone who works for him. His behavior is destructive to the motivation of his subordinates, as he treats them like despicable and undeserving objects; interacting with him causes me more stress than it’s worth, and usually keeps me from doing my job. I am not willing to be proactive and improve a situation in which this person is involved, as he is a counter-productive force, a squanderer of my intelligence, a destroyer of my individuality, and a suppressor of my self-expression and personal freedom. His leadership style is not conducive to my creativity, my initiative, my drive, my industrious work ethic, and my proactive and positive approach to leadership. Our styles of leadership and management are diametrically opposed. He preaches “respect up and down the chain of command,” but treats those under him with little, if any, respect, and is infuriated when he does not receive it from them. He is a terrible leader, in my opinion; and, he has cultivated negative attitudes in everyone who works for him. I am certain that more than ¾, if not all of the personnel who work under him (and possibly all those who have worked under him) would agree that his approach is not only unwelcome, it’s counter-productive, and somehow upset them, or even caused them serious mental distress. Deck seamen desire nothing more than to escape, and so do I. I did extremely well before he arrived, but since he has, he’s been stifling my success, and detracting from others’ recognition of it. I can deal with so much. But, I feel that to continue to endure this maltreatment, about which I feel I can do NOTHING, would be a stupid and self-sacrificing decision. One of us has to go, as I am unwilling to reconcile our differences, and unwilling to continue to produce value for an operation of which he is “in charge.” So, I have determined that I am putting in package for DIVE, as well as my STA21. Until then, I will concentrate only on endeavors outside of my division.

Other than that, I am making significant improvements. I have completed two classes in pursuit of my degree, and now taking an Anatomy and Physiology class. I have to make up my NC Pace course due to negligence on the part of our last Educational Services Officer, but I am confident that I can perform well, if the exam materials show up in time. I am in communication with the school who administered the course materials, and I will work out whatever I can with them. I also plan to request temporary assigned duty at the Naval Hospital in San Diego, so I can improve my medical knowledge and maybe get some connections that will help with STA21. Based on the past, I doubt that my command will support me on that. So I will have to base my actions on the future rather than the past.

I downloaded quite a bit of music production/mixing software that I am working with. I haven’t learned much yet, but it’s a step in the direction I want to go. I also started writing my goals for 2009. I did them a little differently this time, grouping them into areas of focus, like Business, Family, Health/Fitness, Navy Career, and etcetera. I haven’t completed it yet, but I am going to do that tonight, and really get the plans laid out. I am tired of screwing around and spinning my wheels, wearing myself out needlessly. So I am going to have the major accomplishments underneath the areas of focus, which involve longer-term goals, and then have individual actions and milestones (with timelines) for each accomplishment. This year I am going to draft business plans and submit them, at least for my ideas for the club-cam, and the pest control project. I also am going to start writing my “kaizen” book, and draft the Navy Movie, as well as collect the thoughts and entries I have written to and organize them for eventually use in a formal book of philosophy. I’ll also finish up the paperwork for immigration and adoption. I am going to submit another STA21 package, and also submit one for Dive school. One way or another, I have to go somewhere where I am not squelched by others’ commitment to proving human existence to be a depraved one, or at least not have to work for those who have that commitment—or those who have no commitment to the exaltation and improvement of humanity, beginning (and perhaps even ending) with the self. If someone does not have that as a foundation, I don’t want to deal with them.

I have also been reading and thinking about philosophy lately, and even writing a bit about it. I selected that as a minor for my degree, but it will be something in which I am deeply involved and active. I think it is important for everyone, and those who neglect it, neglect the fundamentals of their character and their deeply personal development of it. They leave that undefined, only to be defined by whomever, or to whomever or whatever they’ll define it in response. But, if it is not defined by the determination of one’s own mind, their character is more superficial, less profound, and less personal. There has never been a self-made person who did not have a deliberate, personally developed philosophy. In other words, there has never been a self-made person who did not make their self, quite literally and deliberately.

Tomorrow, I start riding my bike to work again, and working out full-steam. I think that will have a great positive effect on my motivation, confidence, and productivity.